Non-Committal Date

My favorite type of date is the non-committal date. People have lost interest in finding out if it is possible to be friends before starting a major commitment.

Men want quick answers about everything. Women want a commitment now. Pushing for a definite date at the beginning, it is as though they are saying, "Tell me now. Based on my appearance, do you want to commit to me?"

The nuance of the non-committal date is wondrous, because it is a time know someone in a casually and find an intellectual connection. If left in a room together is conversation good enough to imagine marriage?

It isn't hard to go on a non-committal date. Simply say, "Would you like to get a bite to eat?" "How about we go get some coffee?" "I heard about this party. Do you want to go?" It is easy and avoids embarrassment.

Now you are hanging out with your friend. Maybe they want to clarify if they want to be friends or begin dating. Quick phrases eliminate confusion. Insinuate it will never be more than friendship by saying, "Whenever I hang out with my friends I pick up the check once and they pay for the meal next time around." "I will pick up the check next time." "Should we get separate checks?" Even if entertaining the idea of a relationship, now they think you are cheap.

Non-committal dates are great. In fact, most of the stronger relationships begin this way. There might be three or four ambiguous dates before I start asking for separate checks. After we haven't seen each other for awhile, we start dating. We had time to get to know each other as friends. It helps in assessing the person, because it is easier to relax. People who are dating play games. There is an offensive and defense barrier. There are also a lot of head games.

Now you are wondering what happens if the date goes badly, yet you would like to pursue the relationship. First refer to the notes that signify friendship. It is possible to continue seeing the person as a friend. You wouldn’t want to lose them as a friend if there is some chemistry. Remain ambiguous and ask for another date.

Compliments, brushing off lint, discussing future goals, asking for a follow-up meeting, smiling, or picking up the check do not signify a date. It has to be much more obvious. Obvious ways of saying that you are ready to move it to the next level include: trying to hold their hand, asking for an official date to establish a romantic relationship and making obvious statements: such as, "Do you want to get a night cap?" These phrases indicate wanting more out of the relationship.

For women on non-committal date it is your objective to avoid talking about relationship orientated issues. It is not a time to talk about how many children you want unless you want to get married. It is best to stay on business related or friend topics. Make small talk. Talk about the weather, politics, books or magazines. This is a time to let your mind shine. Otherwise, you are going to pay half-of-the-bill. Lacking interests outside being attractive and having children is shallow. This leads to rejection.

Hopefully a lot of people read this. I am tired of over-heated men telling me about their savings accounts, ability to buy homes and provide for me when I don't know their last name. It is a huge turn off. Even if I plan on staying at home and taking care of the children; it is nice to know he has standards.

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