Was it Intuition?

Feeling judged affects behavior. As mentioned previously, our first contact with people establishes a precedent when approaching new people. We all know we are unique individuals and appearance is the least reliable method of accessing capability, yet everyone is capable of dismissing snap judgments.

While everyone should be treated as they truly are, sometimes personal qualities: sound of voice, choice of clothing, appearance and so-on create negative associations. In traumatizing situations everyone is a potential threat. An imaginary threat causes reactions. Over years, remembering various people with similar traits, it becomes easier to reconcile imaginary threats; however, sometimes searching for danger becomes refined.

People may assume this is about race, yet as a girl another girl of the same race thought it was fun to embarrass me. In her mind, I should be a lesser person. After realizing she was not a friend, her traits became a map to identify people who will treat me badly: snob, emotional problem, uncontrollable and evil sense of humor. When meeting another person their voice, eye contact, mannerisms or clothing is upsetting. Becoming conscious of events, despite someone reminding me of her, I am able to act respectfully.

Despite basic interpretations of words, people are misdirected into thinking reactions always related to having a superior attitude. More frequently people who act out are intimidated and want to protect themselves. Later on, a woman reminded me of my childhood bully. They attempted to be nice, yet all the negative associations distorted being able to know them better. Recognizing this I immediately thought she punctured my tires after neighbors re-roofed their home. They left nails in the road so everyone had the same problem. Resisting taking vengeance and slash her tires for several days, I am happy about resisting intuition. Sometimes trying to remain in check is not enough. People should empathize when recognizing a threat is so real and intense all a person can do is create distance before retaliating.

If slashing her tires, there is no accusing vandalizing an innocent person's property. If acting out I would become the profile they use to identify unstable people. When finding someone who is uncontrollably defensive, the best answer it to create distance. People at work do not get to choose a right to be employed. People in community arenas do not decide who goes to church or dance club. By creating distance there is one more person who demonstrated respect for personal space, so when grieving there are acceptable examples of real life people to disprove past trauma.

The world is full of potential danger; however, when a person does not understand they have personal issues, they make traits threatening to other people. Meditate and when someone reminds them of someone else acknowledge they are unique people. Rely on information associated someone who is a positive figure to establish acceptable reactions with others.

The most complicated issues related to imaginary threats are lack of graciousness or false assumptions. Lack of graciousness appears when preferring someone with a familiar or trusted appearance and displacing personal values on them. Though a person looks or a dress like yourself or a friend does not imply they have similar experiences, yet people are more willing to forgive someone when relating to them on a personal level. Falsely believing another person started the problem. False assumptions protect people who should not be protected.

Personal growth happens to everyone. We accept our own flaws and experiences; therefore, take a permissive stance until understanding the situation. When realizing they are different than assumed, people are able to see a person as they are, and it is unnerving. False assumptions are also embarrassing. Thinking someone is agreeable and letting our shields down to expose deepest thoughts and emotions is abrasive when realizing they are not what was assumed.

These types of issues have negative impacts and positive outcomes. Whenever a person is able to disassociate from unsubstantial information, it is possible to reevaluate past associations. Some people rely on intuition; however, reactions might be harmful in the sense of alienating people through deciding everyone is awful or everyone uses each other. When acknowledging people in the past a person is less likely to judge first and allow for longer relationships without engaging in presumptive behavior.

It is important to have self-control. Remaining aloof lasts a short period of time. To gain better, more fulfilling relationships a person extends graciousness to realize another person's potential. In business, this is especially important, because hiring people based on appearance may create an incompetent staff. Over-compensating is not a solution either. A person is motivated, intelligent, competent, and sensitive or not. Perhaps someone representing and old enemy who was self-absorbed and judgmental is the best candidate and nonthreatening.

There are no easy answers. Only time reveals the true character of people. Sometimes it is easy to adjust. Sometimes it takes longer to establish a person as a unique individual. Suspicion, judgment and paranoia create problems. Though a threat might be real, it is better to have facts before taking action, because actions are difficult to undo.

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