Being the Non-Stalker

Finding a balance between being competitive and paranoia is complicated. Many people struggle, because people compete for the same lover, job or business. It is inevitable to meet someone who engages in trash talk or competitive nature in order to lure them into unhealthy patterns.

Trash talking is a sport related method; wherein, a person diverts an opposing team's attention with negative statements to score goals, baskets or whatever. This is fair sportsmanship not meant to cause real harm to another person, because it is, "just a game." Slowing down the other player secures the win, yet two things must happen. They must remain focused on winning, while the opposing is distracted.

In recent history, media and film have glorified predators and stalkers. Many people are being distracted from focusing on the defensive part of competition, through fear of real threats, "not just a game." Being manipulated usually ends badly for the victim, though it seems like a correct answer.

Once upon a time I was being stalked by people who gain attention through hostile means and trash talk. They may say something, such as: "No one likes you," "Who do you think you are," or "Just shut-up, no one cares." They may even threaten violence. This is a vicarious situation, intended to dowse competition or gain a sense of power by controlling another person.

After talking to a psychologist about the issue, I received the best advice, "Don't pay attention to them. Keep going about your regular day and ignore them." It is easy to become entangled in the "Blame Game," a key phrase of another psychologist. Yet, they expanded by saying after informing authorities, your job is done. Don't be taken in and give them the attention they desire. The police are trained to handle these situations. When engaging in compulsive behavior of watching them to know what they are doing, a person loses in two ways: they ignore their own life and they could be accused of being a stalker.

There is a lot of incorrect information of how to address competitors and predators on the internet. Most people advice is to change your routine; however, stalkers energized if they think they have control. Any recognition verifies the presumption they control other people.

Someone is clearly out to harm you, so it is a good idea to occasionally figure out what is going on occasionally and take security measures. One innocuous security measure against plagiarists is to register intellectual property with the government.

Business professionals spent years figuring out the perfect compliment between fulfilling goals and defending against competitors. A successful company relies on producing a product or service, just like an individual relies on going to work or graduating from college. Ergo, roughly 75% of your time should be dedicated to fulfilling life aspirations. The other 25% is focused on observing competitor advances, signals of threatening behavior and general protections against unknown threats. In this way companies avoid hostile takeovers and bankruptcy.

A person overly focused on a threat, instead of, personal survival is likely to make mistakes. A common mistake is loss of job, because of obsessing on a stalker. Some sites say to stay away from the person; however, the mature response is to recognize people need jobs to survive. It is possible to be in the same place and avoid conversation. Another mistake is getting overly involved and writing down another person's activity in a journal. Being able to tell who is a stalker suffering from paranoia and who is going about their daily life is tricky.

The most important lessen is to never become obsessive or give personal control to a person who is trash talking or engaging in recreational harassment. People talk trash all the time. Be aware of your surroundings, but do not inadvertently become a stalker when responding to what feels like a real threat.

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