Compliance Repair

Often people play a disturbing game. Compliance is tricky. Sometimes it is a method of becoming friends with people. Sometimes it is a method of oppressing people.

Normally there is a general method of compliance. We should clean dishes after eating and close our mouths when chewing. When people break the rules there is frequently an unfavorable response. We also learn to be adults and function in society. I was surprised to find out Canadians took their shoes off to enter a home or business. This is especially applicable in the winter season when snow and mud are abundant. I imagine the logic to avoid damaging flooring outweighs the usual United States attitude of knowing when carpets need replacing because of stains or there is noticeable damage.

Another type of compliance is figuring out how to make people happy. Manners are essentially a method to be more appealing to people. It is normal to bring a gift to a Host or Hostess when they invite people to their home. It is also a good idea, because it enhances enjoyment of events. It is also important to listen to people and compliment everyone in order to receive compliments.

These functional forms of compliance are also utilized for control and may harm someone. Everyone has different beliefs, yet there are sometimes paradoxes between the rules a Parent establishes for the benefit of their Children and common activities between Friends or Acquaintances. Parents are aware of this and sometimes make their Children promise to never engage in a certain activity, largely because it could damage reputation or health permanently.

Growing up there was a compliance game between children at school. Basically a Popular Kid would ask and Unpopular Kid to go on a date. The Unpopular Kid feels empathy for the Popular Kid and agrees to a date, because they know that is an important part of them remaining popular. The Popular Kid then mocks the Unpopular Kid. If anything goes against this format there are a few threats. The Unpopular Kids knows their place and continue working on their homework. They are not concerned about popularity. Their life depends on education and socializing is a distraction so they do not feel as though there is a conflict. It makes life easier.

How much compliance is needed to remain peaceful? In most cases there is a choice or option; however, sometimes people want compliance without reward for actions. This might include work without pay. A Student might consider doing everyone's team assignment, because they will learn the most and in the future they will find work where they earn respect. It might be easier for some else to be attractive and learn how to flirt to get help from others. As long as everyone is happy.

Unfortunately, there are groups of people that never find happiness in available systems to make everyone happy. Instead they seem to always think about everyone else and no one ever thinks about them. This tendency is increasing in the United States. There isn't as much concern with how other people will get by and become stronger. Sometimes it feels as though certain people are being selected as weaker and not important. Instead of attempting to assist them in doing better, they are a nuisance. This is when a person has to think about compliance. Would anyone comply to being a scape goat, slavery or death to make another person's life easier? Why would anyone think it is appropriate for anyone to be abused or die so they can have a better life?

In countries with a strong federal or monarch government there are methods of compliance and most people say they are happy. People are born into positions of wealth, work or poverty. They comply with the lifestyle. When a foreigner enters the social stratum, what they are actually doing becomes clear.

A woman might dress well and feel proud because her family is wealthy in their home country; however, existing hierarchy makes fun of her. When she complies and makes new friends, she is not as bold. Complying with the idea of it being alright to harass people does not make her a Popular Girl, it makes her aware of her surroundings in a lower position. She also accept harassing people with lower status is acceptable. Knowing this means she no longer has to endure harassment.

This activity also happens in the United States. Whether it is because we are a federalist country or it is difficult finding new methods of handling life as an independent country is difficult to identify. There is also an issue of suffering through several recessions and depressions over the past few decades. Many believe the Great Depression was our greatest depression; however, the depression in the 1980s was much worse. It was even worse than our current depression. A person could argue strife in relation to economics is causing this problem, yet there is reason to believe compliance was and is an active function of life in the United States.

How does someone know if compliance is healthy or unhealthy? There is a method to evaluate this in relation to morals and ethics. If someone suggests going against a personal or social moral code then it is time to resist complying. Focus on how it changes personal actions and resist telling people to comply. Asking people to comply is agreeing with inappropriate behavior or offering someone else as a sacrifice in order to maintain friendship. In the end, a person asks if you are a hypocrite and if acknowledging you are, there is compliance. It is also important to offer second chances and understand experimentation with other ways of life is not compliance.

This is the least dangerous methods of avoiding compliance. It is great to simply say I do not agree with this. Verbally establish how far you are willing to go to avoid compliance. A person might want to become forceful, manipulative or talkative in response to a dangerous situation; however, when using these methods for self-defense there is compliance. Methods to maintain self-control are worthwhile, yet maintaining control over how and when to defend self is important. A person should defend themselves. To think there will be no further retaliation or attempts to gain or avoid compliance forcefully is wrong.

Compliance is not always wrong. Society builds skyscrapers and computers. Society benefits billions of people. Every method has a flaw. It can go to far and it is better to make compliance difficult when finding a method of life is faulty. A personal arena of compliance, I am fine with gossip. I do not have a problem with gossip. People venting or explaining their side of the story is great. In fact, a small group of friends and I were able to come up with better solutions to problems because of gossip. Talking and communicating are different then gossip. I try to relay information from what I actually see and include the facts that might sound different to someone else. It isn't a great story, yet I cannot count the times advice saved me from doing something really stupid.

In this list of actions around gossip, there is compliance in order to make it socially acceptable or beneficial to society. Another person might chose to never gossip and suffer through false accusations until discovering they really do not gossip. Someone else might be so afraid of gossip the extend gossip into the commonly disruptive associations that most people detest and why it is unlikable.

Related Article
Casting out of Demons
Hypocrisy of Goths
Utilitarianism